Narcissism

I'm about as narcissistic as they come. I'm pretty sure everyone looks at me everyday and notices every thing about me. You know, do my shoes match? Is my part straight? How many days in a row has she worn those earrings? How fat do I look? How bad is my breath?

So...today, my left contact tore and it was pretty irritating, so I had to take it out of my eye and replace it with a spare.

No big deal you say? Well...today my contacts were the green enhancers and the spare contact I changed into was clear. Which means I had one green eye (the enhanced version) and one bluish-gray eye(genetic requirement version) all day.

And no one noticed.

How could that possibly happen when I'm as important as I know I am? I mean what else could they possibly have been thinking about?

I know...I'm as shocked as you all have to be.

In other news, this looks delicious.