31.3.08

How can she be ten??


Ten years ago tonight, I was in labor with my second child. I actually had quite a way to go before I would deliver...the little one was born at 3:12 pm on a Wednesday. She was absolutely perfect. Pink, round, chubby and slippery. I'm not making up that slippery part either. The kid was covered in vernix which took like a week to get off. Seriously, I was scrubbing that stuff from between her fingers and toes forever!

I brought her home and the oldest, who wasn't even two years old at the time, fell in love with her instantly. He wanted to hold her every chance he got. He was (and still can be) a very loving older brother. The two of them changed my life forever.

You know...parenting is a difficult job. It never ends and no matter how much you think you are ready for kids, you're not. The responsibility is overwhelming, and at times can be suffocating. You can never be completely prepared for what will come your way once you're a parent.

It's difficult to not try to live your dreams through your kids. All the things you wanted to accomplish, but didn't...you want for your kids - whether they want it or not. All the mistakes you made in your life, you want to keep them from making - even though you wouldn't know what you know if you hadn't made those mistakes for yourself. You want to spare them any pain, want them to only be happy, and to never want for anything...ever.

As a parent, you want to give your child things you never could possibly give them, so it's a job you'll fail...no matter what. Yeah...sign me up.

On the anniversaries of their births, you can't help but wax nostalgic. You can't help but marvel in what half your DNA has become, and excite in the potential of their future...and you cry a little - for the time that has past that you'll never get back...and for the possibilities of what will be...you can't help it.

So, a decade has passed...wonder where she'll be a decade from now?

2 comments:

PHSChemGuy said...

The vernix thing is disgusting...

calencoriel said...

The weird thing is that vernix is very common in premature babies, but it's supposed to be gone when a baby is full term. The little one was 8 days late and weighed in at 8 lbs 11 ozs...it's not like they miscalculated her due date...

she was cute once it all rubbed off though...